Last week I brought up feeling word charts with the hope that giving a few words for emotional experience may encourage you to explore which word(s) fit for you. At first, identifying emotions off of a chart seems unnatural… because it is! For some, it also feels forced… because it is! Just like working out, when you first start working out, it does not feel so great, but over time, the next day’s soreness is refreshing and encouraging. Here’s the point with the feeling word charts: Identifying your emotions is important for your mental health. Starting with the chart can help you identify your emotional experience, some words may be too intense, others too weak. Use these words to examine yourself and once you find the word that fits just right, move on!
One of the fundamental aspects of identifying emotions is accepting them. The emotions you experience cannot be identified if you do not accept them, or are trying to change them. For some, sad emotions are difficult to accept (after all, who wants to be sad?), others find themselves perpetually frustrated, angry or numb. But regardless of what emotion you are experiencing, you will need to accept them as true and valuable in order for you to be able to move past being sad, numb or angry.
If you see with your eyes that the stove is hit because it is glowing red, would you need to touch it to confirm that this is true? Of course not! So, it is with our emotions. Our emotions help us make sense of our environment. For example, when you feel afraid there is a reason why you are feeling afraid. Or when you are immediately overwhelmed with anxiety and fear at work when your boss comes into your office unannounced. Your emotions are setting the frame for your brain to process the experience. If you are unaccepting of the frame as invalid, wrong or needing to change, you won’t be able to make sense of the information that your other senses and thoughts have taken in.
Your emotions are not to be man-handled into a specific form or outline, which is why looking at a chart can seem in-genuine. But over time, you will be able to explain your emotions with greater complexity and accuracy, but it first starts by moving past “I’m mad” or “I’m sad” or “I’m glad”. Mad/sad/glad is a great place to start, so if that feels natural start there. But all your human experience is not summed up in mad/sad/glad. Explore what overwhelms you. Accept what makes you afraid. Press into what makes you content or happy. Accepting your internal messages is step one to moving onto what is next.
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