Gottman Method Couples Therapy in San Diego and California

Research Background

The Gottman Method for Couples Therapy is based off of the findings of Seattle Researchers, Drs. John and Julie Gottman. The Gottman’s researched and observed thousands of couples since the 1970’s and continues today. 

The research focuses on what makes relationships succeed or fail. In fact, the results of the research can predict with 96% accuracy which newlyweds will get divorced in the immediate future if they dont do anything to change their relationship’s trajectory. This prediction is based on nine main characteristics of the Gottman’s relationship research. The good news is that I have direct and impactful interventions to improve the areas that you as a couple need help with.

The method is designed to help teach specific tools to deepen friendship and intimacy in your relationship. To help you productively manage conflicts, you will be given methods to dialogue about gridlocked (perpetual) issues in a way that draws you closer together. We will also work together to help you appreciate your relationship strengths and to gently navigate through its vulnerabilities.

If you and your significant other are committed to making your relationship stronger, this type of therapy fortifies the relationship by improving conflict management, communication, friendship, emotional connection, and intimacy.

Most couples can expect to accomplish 6 months worth of weekly couples therapy sessions in 12 or 18 hours, though some relationships could need more than 6 months of therapy to get their relationship where they want it.

If you and your significant other are not sure about the future of your relationship, I can assist you with relationship discernment counseling.

You can find out more about the Gottman Method, their research findings, or how to participate in a training or relationship study on their website.

Phases of Gottman Method Couples Therapy

Gottman Method Couples Therapy Consists of Five Parts:

  1. Assessment

  2. Treatment

  3. Out of Therapy

  4. Termination

  5. Outcome Evaluation

ASSESSMENT

The first three hours we will be assessing the problem areas of the relationship jointly and in a solo session.  To save you time and money, you will fill out an in depth questionnaire at home. Here is a PDF download with more information about the Gottman Connect Relationship Check Up.

In the next session, I will meet with each of you individually to learn your personal histories and to give each of you the opportunity to share thoughts, feelings and perceptions. In the final session of assessment, I will share with you my recommendations for treatment and with to define a mutually agreed-upon goals for your therapy

TREATMENT

Most of the work will involve sessions in which you will be seen together as a couple. However, there may be times when individual sessions are recommended. I may also give you exercises to practice between sessions to practice at home. We will work on repairing past hurts, getting to know each other again, staying positive during conflict and reviving mutual dreams for your shared future together.

The length of therapy will be determined by your specific needs and goals. In the course of therapy, we will establish points at which to evaluate your satisfaction and progress. Also, I will encourage you to raise any questions or concerns that you have about therapy at any time.

OUT OF THERAPY + TERMINATION

In the later stage of therapy, we will phase out or meet less frequently in order for you to test out your new relationship skills and to prepare for termination of the therapy. Although you may wish to terminate therapy whenever you wish, it is most helpful to have at least one session together to summarize progress, define the work that remains to be done, and to say goodbye.

OUTCOME EVALUATION

In the outcome-evaluation phase, as pter the Gottman Method, four follow up sessions are planned: one after six months, one after 12 months, one after 18 months, and one after 2 years. These sessions have been shown through research to significantly decrease the chances of relapse into previous, unhelpful patterns. In addition, commitment to providing the best therapy possible requires ongoing evaluation of methods used and Client progress. The purpose of these follow-up sessions then will be to fine-tune any of your relationship skills if needed and to evaluate the effectiveness of the therapy received.